Communication requires the listener to be capable of listening well. Scare tactics are highly likely to result in someone who (on a biological/chemical level) is not capable of listening to you well due to stress, and on an emotional level, now much less
willing to listen to you. I'd consider it similar to practicing for a shooting sport, where you learn to hit the targets first and then learn to hit them faster... first get the significant other to learn to tolerate/respect the concept of firearms and then work on further indoctrination.
