Some things to ponder...

RogerB · 10-09-2008

I got this from another forum, thought I'd share it here.

Some things to ponder.........

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

13 Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

14. Stop singing and read on.........

15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

18. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

19. Do you wonder why you started reading this in the first place?

strongcrow · 10-09-2008

Dogman · 10-09-2008

These are the questions that baffle the greatest minds.

Annie · 10-09-2008

For "13.", it's Baa Baa Black Sheep, too.
And as for "16."...that just means you really need a TicTac.

whiskeytangofoxtrot · 10-09-2008

#9 the reason is he wants to be accountable for himself and get his own dinner...and the thrill of the hunt I suppose...that he would appreciate it much more that way...IDK thinking too much this morning after class.

ATM · 10-09-2008

20. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

epsylum · 10-09-2008

21. Why do they call it "taking a dump", you aren't taking it anywhere, they should call it "leaving a dump".

That is credited to Beavis from Beavis and Butthead. It still cracks me up to this day, especially since it was done in his Andy Rooney voice.

SavageEagle · 10-09-2008

I'm still stuck on 14 but #1 and #2 still have me a bit puzzled. That musta been one desperate man or woman to drink from those things... and how did they know there was that yummyness inside that egg? Wow, you've actually stimulated my brain! So that's what it feels like to think...

10-09-2008	#1 (permalink)
RogerB Something witty goes here... Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: New Palestine Posts: 2,944	Some things to ponder... I got this from another forum, thought I'd share it here. Some things to ponder......... 1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" 2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt." 3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? 4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? 5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? 6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? 7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? 8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? 9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? 10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? 11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? 12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? 13 Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? 14. Stop singing and read on......... 15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? 16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? 17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? 18. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 19. Do you wonder why you started reading this in the first place? __________________ The views displayed in this post are those only of the person posting and do not necessarily reflect the views of this forum as a whole or its owner and operators. "You never have trouble if you are prepared for it." -- Theodore Roosevelt

10-09-2008	#2 (permalink)
strongcrow Marksman Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Indy Central Posts: 628	__________________ "No law ever written has stopped any robber,rapist,or killer like cold blue steel in the hands of his last intended victim." W.Emerson Wright

10-09-2008	#3 (permalink)
Dogman Master Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 3,061	These are the questions that baffle the greatest minds. __________________ Handgun control is using both hands. "Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." - Robert A. Heinlein

10-09-2008	#4 (permalink)
Annie Master Join Date: May 2008 Location: N/E Corner Posts: 2,866	For "13.", it's Baa Baa Black Sheep, too. And as for "16."...that just means you really need a TicTac. __________________ ~No matter how responsible she seems, never give a monkey your gun.~ Now yer as smart as I am~Jay

10-09-2008	#5 (permalink)
whiskeytangofoxtrot Scruffy looking hillbilly Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Deadman's Hollow, Vermillion County Posts: 1,224	#9 the reason is he wants to be accountable for himself and get his own dinner...and the thrill of the hunt I suppose...that he would appreciate it much more that way...IDK thinking too much this morning after class. __________________ *"These are the times that try men's souls." - The American Crisis, Thomas Paine* Do your duty in all things. You cannot do more, you should never wish to do less. - Robert E. Lee

10-09-2008	#6 (permalink)
ATM BanKing Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Crawfordsville Posts: 5,390	20. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? __________________ -The mind is a terrible thing to taste- Say no to drugs. Say yes to bacon!

10-09-2008	#7 (permalink)
epsylum What's going on up here? Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Indianapolis, IN Posts: 1,005	21. Why do they call it "taking a dump", you aren't taking it anywhere, they should call it "leaving a dump". That is credited to Beavis from Beavis and Butthead. It still cracks me up to this day, especially since it was done in his Andy Rooney voice. __________________ "That wasn’t a Mario reference; it was a reference to my friend Toph. One time he took a bunch of mushrooms and kidnapped a girl." - Michael Swaim

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