Against owning a gun...

[rhino]

I think my mom still doesn't like that I sometimes have contact with firearms, and even though I'm a boy, I'm her baby (the youngest!). She's mostly good about it, but every once in a while I get a reminder. Every time I leave the house to take a class, teach a class, shoot a match, etc. she asks me not to go.

Hopefully you'll get some good instruction from a good teacher and the confidence you build as your skills grow and develop will help you deal with the inevitable objections from family members.

[JByer323]

The only advice I can give you is once you've picked/purchased said gun, get some training. Most importantly, everyone needs it.

But you an also now tell your mom/sister "Look, I own a gun, but I've taken practical courses in how to use and implement is safely and efficiently."

That's what we call ammo.

[Annie Oakley]

Originally Posted by jennybird

Or, show your mom and sister this...


Your mom sounds like mine. She wants me to be all pretty and feminine... I simply say. "Fine mom. I'll buy a PINK gun!"

Hon, there comes a point in your life where you realize that what other people think doesn't matter. They do not define who you are. But for what it's worth, I think you're AWESOME!!!

Love this and I think she is AWESOME as well. Good lord, I hate pink.....

[IndyRoadie]

Originally Posted by JByer323

The only advice I can give you is once you've picked/purchased said gun, get some training. Most importantly, everyone needs it.

But you an also now tell your mom/sister "Look, I own a gun, but I've taken practical courses in how to use and implement is safely and efficiently."

That's what we call ammo.

I can't praise the NRA Basic Pistol course enough. I highly recommend it.

Rachel, you will even get a frameable certificate you can hang on the wall to point to when you say "See! I even took training!"

[Jack Ryan]

Originally Posted by RachelMarie

...I'm really getting fed up.
I'm not sure how to handle this. I feel very strongly about purchasing (and carrying) and I dont want to hear the crap lines they are feeeding me.

I'm not sure the reasoning behind their comments. Maybe it's because I am the baby of the family, and at 25 they refuse to think I am grown up...

It just really boils down to one thing, are you REALLY grown up?

If you are living on your own, paying your own bills, and supporting yourself then you are a grown up ready to take responsibility for your own decisions. Can't stop advice but in the end you can do what you want. If this is the case my advice is to just not bring it up. What would be the point?

If you still live with mom and dad, they pay your bills, tuition, rent or provide you with a car, what ever, then you are not a grown up ready to make your own decisions and accept responsibility for the results.

[IUGradStudent]

Originally Posted by JByer323

The only advice I can give you is once you've picked/purchased said gun, get some training. Most importantly, everyone needs it.

But you an also now tell your mom/sister "Look, I own a gun, but I've taken practical courses in how to use and implement is safely and efficiently."

That's what we call ammo.

I was thinking this, too. I was also thinking maybe taking a course that includes a unit on how to keep control of your weapon in an encounter would also be good. Then when they say your gun will be taken away from you and used against you you can respond that you've had training in how to avoid that (probably from the same people who train the police). A private 1-2 hour session just on that after you've done NRA Pistol or something similar might be good -- or a more "fighting pistols" oriented course, though that might be a bit too intense. Just another idea to consider. Best of luck with the fam! And don't get too frustrated and mad -- if you do that you've already lost no matter what you say!

[tedbower]

Training,Training,Training, you cant get enough. I handed my 14 yr old son a colt 45 I bought ,I said it might be loaded , his response was i have heard that all my life i'll check it.I know he will but i still have to say it.

[lovemywoods]

It's normal to want the approval of your family regarding all aspects of your life. The reality is that it isn't always going to happen.

Understanding the reason(s) they don't approve of your decision to protect yourself and your family may make it easier for you to move ahead with your decision without dragging a cargo of guilt or awkwardness. You may want to have a candid discussion with them to explore their concerns. The goal is to understand their points of view, not to endorse them. Along the way, you may be able to reduce some of their concerns by educating them about responsible firearms use and ownership.

One source of resistance will not likely be identified, but it is often very real. Whenever someone in a group decides to do something that is outside the normal pattern for the group, there is a reaction against that idea or choice so that the group's normalcy is maintained. The new idea causes the people in the group to examine themselves and ask whether they should be going in this new direction. This can cause very painful self-inspection. This upsets the 'harmony' within the group. It can cause a very strong reaction and often the people may not even know why they are reacting the way they are.

Let me give an example.
‘Susan’ is part of a multi-generational welfare family. Most people in her family either hold non-skilled jobs or none at all. High school is the highest level reached by anyone in the family. Susan is bright and decides to go to college. What seems like a noble idea is met with resistance all around. Susan is peppered with questions and concerns about the cost and benefit of going to college. She is repeatedly quizzed about why she feels the need to go away from the area and go to school. Why doesn’t she just get married and start a family like everyone else in the family? Anecdotal evidence is offered about other people who went to college and are now working in a fast food place. Susan can’t understand why her family doesn’t support her in this decision.

Here’s the key lesson. Susan’s decision to go to college forces people in her family to examine their lives and raises questions about why they didn’t have more ambition and go to school. It makes them uncomfortable because they don’t want to have to think about questions like these. It makes them psychologically threatened. To avoid going anywhere near that threat, they will turn on the person causing them to ask those uncomfortable questions. That’s why Susan’s family was unsupportive of her choice. It wasn’t about her, it was really about them!

Stick to you guns (pun intended), tell your family often that you love them and forge ahead! Over time, they will get used to the idea of you and firearms and they will quit talking about it.

[kludge]

^^^ rep'd

Originally Posted by esrice

Rachel, keep in mind that your mother and sister are simply projecting their own fears onto your situation. When they ask things like "Why would you want to carry a gun?", what they are really saying is "I am scared of guns and would never carry one". Their reasons for not liking guns are fear- and emotion-based-- not logical. Tossing facts and figures might help a bit, but a total turnaround probably won't happen until they conquer their fear. And keep in mind that their fear might not necessarily be fear of guns, but perhaps fear of self-reliance or fear of conflict. Your choosing to carry a gun might be bringing up some ugly truths they don't want to face-- truths like "we're vulnerable" or "there are predators out there". Many people take the "ignorance is bliss" attitude and are content to stick their heads in the sand.

rep'd.

Wow, 9 hours and 5 pages... I hope women are treated this well at gun shops/shows.

... I'm not addressing anyone in particular here, but my wife is sleeping and I'm not; so sorry if I ramble...

... I don't remember who made the comment about "they'll just take your gun away and use it against you" but... If someone is going to take your gun away from you, pulling the trigger will almost always prevent it. Action is always faster than reaction... do something (besides cowering) and you will disrupt their plan.

For the ones who say a woman should just get a stun gun/martial arts classes... I say, Why on earth do you want him that close to you? Why, as women often suggest these things to other women, would I choose a fighting method that still leaves me at such a disadvantage? "Well I don't want to kill anybody" is often the answer. Of course you don't, you're a thinking, feeling human being. But obviously the piece of trash guy attacking you has no such consideration for your welfare, and couldn't care less whether you live or die.

All a woman has to do is find a reason deep within for why she wants to live, and she will kick and claw until her last breath, just like Momma Bear, and wanting to protect a child is one of the many reasons... but also consider that even when you're not with your child, and your child is not the one being directly threatened, the pain and suffering your child will bear without you is also reason to keep yourself alive.

[RachelMarie]

Originally Posted by Jack Ryan

It just really boils down to one thing, are you REALLY grown up?

If you are living on your own, paying your own bills, and supporting yourself then you are a grown up ready to take responsibility for your own decisions. Can't stop advice but in the end you can do what you want. If this is the case my advice is to just not bring it up. What would be the point?

If you still live with mom and dad, they pay your bills, tuition, rent or provide you with a car, what ever, then you are not a grown up ready to make your own decisions and accept responsibility for the results.

Are you serious? I'm a 25 year old MOM/WIFE...Of course I dont live with my parents.
I'm going to bed. I just wanted to get that out there!