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Old 07-25-2008   #1 (permalink)
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Dating and Guns from the female perspective

So I'm almost ready to start dating again after a divorce (a year and a half ago.) The ex-wife knew all about my hobby before we started dating and there wasn't a problem.


So now I have to worry about introducing a date to my hobby.

Carrying during a date could be problematic.

Being asked, "Hey what's in the big green cabinet?" - also a problem.

I don't really subscribe to the "my way or the highway" theory and realize that not everyone grew up with a few AK-clones in the house.


Any advice from a female poster on how this should be handled?
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Old 07-25-2008   #2 (permalink)
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It really all depends on the girl...

I don't think I would make it priority topic #1. But if you go out a few times, it's bound to come up in conversation at some point. If she's already to the point where she's at your house and you're getting cozy and she notices the big green cabinet... chances are she's in to you enough that (at least for that night) it won't matter. I'll be honest, the hobby could be a make-it-or-break-it thing, but if your new date really likes you, she'll accept is as part of you. You never know, you might find yourself with a new range buddy.

One way you could bring it up is, "Oh I'd love to go to the zoo with you on Saturday, but I've already made plans to go shooting with some buddies of mine. You're welcome to come along if you want." (and actually genuinely mean she's welcome to tag along).

But then again, the last time I tried dating, I told the guy I couldn't live with a smoker. He stopped smoking that night, and moved in the next week. Seven and a half years later, I still haven't been able to get rid of him.
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Old 07-25-2008   #3 (permalink)
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PS... I'll add this tidbit: If you get a keeper, and she's really digging you but not the gun hobby, read some of the other posts on how to bring your girl around. The key is that it has to be her decision to accept the guns and it can't be forced on her. Know what her stopping point is in the discussions and always stop at that point, but gently keep nudging her until she comes around. It doesn't have to be a "my way or the highway" type approach. Just understand it may take her some time (read: a year or two) to be more accepting of it. It's part of who you are, and it's not fair to you to ask you to drop something you like doing just to keep her happy.
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Old 07-25-2008   #4 (permalink)
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Just date girls from the range. Problem solved.
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Old 07-25-2008   #5 (permalink)
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Just date girls from the range. Problem solved.
Haha! I was thinking that, too. However, I have yet to see a girl at the range that wasn't batting for the other team or attached to some hunky guy or three.
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Old 07-25-2008   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pami View Post
Haha! I was thinking that, too. However, I have yet to see a girl at the range that wasn't batting for the other team or attached to some hunky guy or three.


I wasn't going to say that, but I was sure as hell thinking it!
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Old 07-25-2008   #7 (permalink)
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Old 07-25-2008   #8 (permalink)
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When my girlfriend saw my G19 for the first time, it caught her off guard. Mainly because I had been carrying it the whole time without her knowing, even while we were at her mother's house.

Luckily she is ok with it, and even enjoys shooting.
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Old 07-25-2008   #9 (permalink)
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My wife was not a real gun fun when we were married (27 years ago I might add ) But she came around.

Even been able to have her fire my G22.
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Old 07-26-2008   #10 (permalink)
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Being a female also, I agree with the "I'm going to do some shooting, would you like to come along? (Or: "I'd like you to come along")

That would tell her about your "hobby/interests" and that you would like to share your passion with her - without getting all "macho".
You could also point out that there may even be other women there that she could talk with - if she is not ready to do any shooting - yet.
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