25 year marriage in the toilet

[copo]

cover your ass with lawyer. move what items you want to safe place. and keep head up and good friends and family close. My divorce sucked after 10 years and thankfully no kids involved. And good luck to you. And after all is said and done treat yourself to something! Mine was my 67 Camaro!

 

[Doug]

Whatever you do and however long it takes, find a way to forgive her.
That doesn't necessarily mean you take her back, but don't carry anger and bitterness for the rest of your life.

 

[churchmouse]

Whatever you do and however long it takes, find a way to forgive her.
That doesn't necessarily mean you take her back, but don't carry anger and bitterness for the rest of your life.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^This^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

[Hoosier8]

I`m not going to post too much personal stuff on the interwebs, Just a simple question.
For those of you that have been thru it, How do/did you deal with it ? (Wife caught cheating)


And I don`t drink, so that`s out
Rick

My first wife took off out of the blue with another guy after 10 years. She had some emotional issues after losing our son at birth and the worst part about it was that we never talked about it during the divorce, she was just gone and I wasn't able to talk to her for 18 years. We are good friends now but that was hard and hurtful. They say it takes 1/2 the length of your marriage to get over it so don't just jump into something else right away or you will not yet be just you.

She married the other guy and he turned out to be a dick.

 

[Snapdragon]

Whatever you do and however long it takes, find a way to forgive her.
That doesn't necessarily mean you take her back, but don't carry anger and bitterness for the rest of your life.

Repped.

 

[femurphy77]

I had a "good" divorce. No cheating that I'm aware of on either side, the relationship had died long ago and one day I woke up and told myself it was time to live again. The goods were amicably distributed and we each went our seperate ways. I'm now happier than I've ever been in all those 25 years of my marriage, to me well worth it. Trust will be a big issue in your case, personally I couldn't. If you can't trust your spouse. . . .

Good luck and motor on.

 

[NyleRN]

I don't care what anyone says, if she's cheated on you, she's probably done it more than you know and she WILL do it again.

That's the most ignorant statement made in this thread

 

[LEaSH]

Dude I haven't even posted yet.Seriously though, ingo'rs know everything about anything. And I say this as an ingo'r so that's the paradox that is...

 

[davedolli]

Get a Lawyer and move forward. Cover your A$$ in every aspect of this no matter what she says.

This first and foremost.

Time heals all wounds.

You will find another and have what you want.

Learn from this.


Dave

 

[Mr Evilwrench]

Ok, since it's over and no kids, get what you can to a safe place where she can't get to it. I was doing that in preparation for a divorce when my first wife checked out. A judge may order you to fork some of it over, but keep it under your control. You can trust yourself better than you can her. I know it's something that means a lot to you after 25 years, but you have to be able to just shut it off. Flip the switch. I had a few long term relationships between marriages, and the last one ended hard. She's tried a couple of times, but I've kept to no contact, and once the shock wore off, it's kept me sane. Heck, a couple of others kept after me. That's what you should do (in my opinion), just to keep your own mind straight. We've both married since then, and I don't know about her, but I'm quite confident I have the right one at last.

 

[churchmouse]

Ok, since it's over and no kids, get what you can to a safe place where she can't get to it. I was doing that in preparation for a divorce when my first wife checked out. A judge may order you to fork some of it over, but keep it under your control. You can trust yourself better than you can her. I know it's something that means a lot to you after 25 years, but you have to be able to just shut it off. Flip the switch. I had a few long term relationships between marriages, and the last one ended hard. She's tried a couple of times, but I've kept to no contact, and once the shock wore off, it's kept me sane. Heck, a couple of others kept after me. That's what you should do (in my opinion), just to keep your own mind straight. We've both married since then, and I don't know about her, but I'm quite confident I have the right one at last.

Yes, anything you value as in heirlooms, personal items, guns, Money, etc.
People change when a relationship ends. I saw the handwriting on the wall with my 1st "X" but did not get to work fast enough. I went away on a planned 4 day Drag race in Kentucky for the division Bracket finals. When I returned the house was "EMPTY"............really, "EMPTY"
I had only the cloths I left with, my race rig and tools. My cloths/guns.....everything, Gone. I did get some of the items back and had to threaten 2 guys that had my boat. They said they bought it but I did have all the paperwork in my safety deposit box. She did not get to that. I got my boat back and they were seriously Pi$$ed off. It was just ugly.
I did not see that in her but she had some tutoring from a few friends.
Get a Lawyer................................"NOW"

 

[Blown71X]

Get a Lawyer................................"NOW"

Trust me.........They opened at 9, I walked in the door at 9:01

 

[churchmouse]

Trust me.........They opened at 9, I walked in the door at 9:01

Bingo

 

[LPMan59]

That's the most ignorant statement made in this thread

actually there's a good chance that he's correct. cheaters are often serial cheaters. I wont go so far as to say it's a rule, but many times leopards do not in fact change their spots.

 

[Harleyrider_50]

That's the most ignorant statement made in this thread

Got'a go wth the Moses dude on this'n.....I've lived it....and PAY'd for it....TWICE'd.....they could'n stay out the bars, or keep they thongs on......

A snake'll ALWAYS bite'cha.....eventually.....an' they cold-blood'd, an' ain't got no concious, neither........

 

[Mr Evilwrench]

Good to see you're on it. I had a guy take out a storage locker in his name that I paid for with cash. Untraceable. Closed it as soon as I could, but it was handy for a while. I also did a lot of things I'm not proud of nor would admit to (some of them were not entirely legal). It was hideous, but mostly because I wasn't willing to give up. You won't enjoy it, but you'll be better off after it's done. Stay strong, man.

 

[Harleyrider_50]

Trust me.........They opened at 9, I walked in the door at 9:01

X'cellent move........ya got'a tuff row ta hoe......make no mistake 'bout it......it'a cost a azzload....in more ways than $$......

 

[calcot7]

I don't really have anything to add to what others have already stated so I'll just say I am sorry for you and wish you all the luck in the world. Stay strong..........

 

[dusty88]

My brother went through the same thing, also after 25 years of marriage. I am glad you are taking the lawyer's advice.

Also don't be afraid to call on friends. And consider counseling to help you get through this and move on to the next phase of your life.

I'm really sorry.

 

[Blown71X]

Oh.....and tomorrow is my Birthday........Happy F%&#in birthday to me