Had a conversation with my mom on guns...

[digitalphoenix]

She is totally against any kind of gun and supports a gun ban on all accounts. Now being me, I gave her statistics and logic on behalf of owning a gun. She does not want anything to do with them and I always get the "what are you doing with another one of those" every time I bring a new firearm in.

It basically went like this...

Me: "What are you going to do when a guy busts down the front door carrying a 9mm?"

Mom: "I've got a baseball bat."

Me: "That baseball bat isn't going to be effective with a person holding a far more superior weapon."

Mom: "Then I guess it will just have to be my time"

I was speechless, I can not understand how people think like this. I love my mom a lot, but I think she is wrong on all accounts.

I'd feel a hell of a lot better that she's armed with at least a handgun since dad passed on 2 years ago from cancer. He had a Hi-point 9 that I gave to a friend of his for opening up my dad's gun safe.

What can I do about this situation?

 

[poptab]

Convincing your mom is tuff business especially with her current stance. My parents were indifferent but the recent string of events motivated them a bit.

The only thing you can do is put a bug in her ear. You will never argue her down. Trust me it doesnt work and just adds family drama.

 

[BogWalker]

Wow, that is a sticky situation. My parents flip-flop routinely on gun control. One day mom wants a handgun, the next she wants an AWB. She seems to think bulk purchases are evil because every time I want a can of x54 I get the same old "Why do you need so much ammo who are you planning on shooting?"

Your situation sounds much worse though. My parents are at least open to the idea of guns. I don't think there is any way to convince your mother. Anti-gun people generally are just way too set in their ways.

 

[Dargasonus]

My parents carry and love guns as much as I do

 

[00Buck]

Don't waste your time, it is a no win situation and the argument never ends.

Give her a big hug, tell her you love her and let her know you would do what ever was needed to save her life if the unfortunate situation was ever to arise.

 

[williamsburg]

I've tried getting my mom to keep something just in case but my mom is the same way except she uses the "I have an alarm and it's always on" excuse.
She says she don't want nor need a gun. She is easily persuaded by the media. I've tried debating her with no luck. To the point where all I could do is throw my hands up and wave it off as a lost battle.
The funny thing is she was married to my dad for over 35 years and never knew he had a gun. Only found out after he passed last year.

 

[rimfire_crazed]

Don't waste your breath.

 

[thatgtrguy]

If your mom is willing to use a baseball bat then it doesn't sound like she is a pacifist. It sounds like she thinks that guns are the problem and more guns are not the solution. I doubt any argument you make will change her position.

 

[Turfweazel]

I have the same fight with my parents any time guns come up. I just try to avoid all gun talk now. You will not change her mind. I know what you are talking about when you say how can people think like this.

 

[Khazik]

Watching the evening news, I had a similar conversation with my mom, except I think with logical causality reasoning. Based on our discussion, I believe I understand some concerns she has and why she's pro-control:

1) Willingness to defend oneself by means of deadly force. I argue the logic "If you are not willing to defend your life, what right do you have to it?" as being unwilling to defend your life, you waive your right to live, as why should anyone else be willing to defend the life which you are unwilling to defend? She then reveals she shouldn't be compelled to defend her life in today's society, as she has the right to live, and wonders why someone else has the right to end hers. The counter is-they don't have the right to take your life and never will. So now it's an argument of exercising your right to life against another exercising their desire to take yours, and how you go about enforcing your right to life. She was convinced on this point, but still didn't know why she has to defend her life, I said "because there will always be evil attempting to remove the good in this world." bringing me to point 2.

2) How to stop the crazies? The pro-control mentality wants to stop evil & crazy people from acquiring arms which I can agree with. This gets to the point of "who defines mental incompetence or instability?" citing that Tennessee cardiologist deeming his prepper patient mentally unstable. In short-you never will stop the crazies, they-like the criminals-will always find a way to be armed because not every 'crazy' or criminal purchases firearms. She wasn't happy to hear there will always be crazy people or evil people in the world, but found it a fair assertion.

3) Magazine capacity she's still for, even after citing that Virginia Tech shooter who just brought more magazines rather fewer magazines with higher capacity. I offered to show her just how long it takes me to reload a magazine (bear in mind I'm a former active duty Marine), informing her of about 2 seconds and even quicker if I can close the slide/bolt with the same hand holding the grip. Then told her "with a reduced magazine capacity, I would take my time with each shot, becoming more accurate and deadly as I'm making sure my shots kill". Asserting the causality a reduced magazine capacity would have the reverse effect of curbing the lethality of any gun violence, but serve to exacerbate it.

She then said she'd rather use a poison dart or phaser, stating the recoil of the weapons she fired was just too much for her (being my old .38sp airweight S&W 638 snubby which I recently sold). I told her she should shoot our friend's 9mm semi auto and she'd be pleased with the recoil. So it all came down to recoil for her... go figure.

We then agreed that an educated and armed public would be the greatest prevention of evil ('crazies', robbers, etc..). The recent robberies going on at many apartment complexes only add to the weight of reason to take up arms to defend oneself as 'the only real prevention comes from the barrel of a gun' unfortunately, then phasers when they're invented, etc... We thought instead of kids growing up taught to fear guns, they should learn to use them early on, and competently so, and taught they're responsible for their actions they take with any firearm (every bullet sent down range, hitting bystanders, etc..).

We also thought it'd be great if there was a semester-long college course teaching marksmanship, safety, accuracy, etc... Could you imagine a 4-5 month college course in firearms usage?!

TLDR (Too Long Didn't Read): It all came down to recoil, willingness to defend your life and why. I believe she's a bit more realistic, and more anti-control now.

 

[Nayls47]

I have been in the same situation for 34 years. I doubt you'll change her mind. I haven't changed my moms yet. It's like

 

[aaron580]

Thankfully my parents are not AGAINST guns, they are just nervous around them. And my sister is going to start doing 4H shooting sports soon (im stunned) so hopefully she will be into guns like I am someday. My parents say they are "worried" about me coming home with a few more toys recently but always end up taking an interest in them. They also expressed they do not want me to carry even with a permit. BUT...they can't control that.

 

[GoNavy]

had the same conversation with my ma as I was in the same boat. I think she is starting to see the light

 

[Libertarian01]

To Digitalphoenix,

I do not know your family dynamics that well nor have we ever met so I will begin with giving my condolences for the loss of your father.

I might take the tack, were I in your shoes, that the next time my mother was so flip about it "being her time" I would ask respectfully if she has updated her will? If not, then we need to get to the attorney right away and make certain that I as her loving son, do not want any more headaches than are necessary with probate or other relatives.

If this were to catch her off guard then I would simply explain that if she is truly so flip with her own protection we need to be realistic and make certain that all the bases are covered. With that in mind I want to know where all the investment paperwork is, where the will is, what all of the assets are and what file drawer they are in. Also where is the tax information. Because this is information that I will need to have easy access to on your passing.

This somewhat kind but blatant push to face mortality - for real - may push her to really think about an issue that she is really being flip and naive about.

Another tack you could take is to clip a bunch of articles from the NRA publications showing elderly folks defending themselves with firearms and NOT baseball bats. If they can do it why not her?

Finally you could invite her to take a gun safety class with you. This may help desensitize her to being around firearms and using one for self defense. Maybe an all female class would make her more comfortable.

If none of that works then you should rest comfortably knowing that the vast majority of Americans will never need a firearm for self defense. There were 12,000 homicides last year out of 315 million people. This means that odds of being killed are 1 out of 26,000. While I have rounded the numbers a bit the fact is we do live in an extremely safe country. Take comfort in that.

Regards,

Doug

 

[wagyu52]

She is totally against any kind of gun and supports a gun ban on all accounts. Now being me, I gave her statistics and logic on behalf of owning a gun. She does not want anything to do with them and I always get the "what are you doing with another one of those" every time I bring a new firearm in.

It basically went like this...

Me: "What are you going to do when a guy busts down the front door carrying a 9mm?"

Mom: "I've got a baseball bat."

Me: "That baseball bat isn't going to be effective with a person holding a far more superior weapon."

Mom: "Then I guess it will just have to be my time"

I was speechless, I can not understand how people think like this. I love my mom a lot, but I think she is wrong on all accounts.

I'd feel a hell of a lot better that she's armed with at least a handgun since dad passed on 2 years ago from cancer. He had a Hi-point 9 that I gave to a friend of his for opening up my dad's gun safe.

What can I do about this situation?

Yeah.......Mom here is a thought, What if they don't want to kill you. There are things worse than death.

 

[actaeon277]

She may have never experienced raw violence. Easy to make a flippant statement like that, in a clinical environment.
A person that had been to intensive care after being bludgened almost to death may disagree with her. Or someone who lost their children. Would they say "I guess it was their time?"

 

[Nayls47]

Yeah.......Mom here is a thought, What if they don't want to kill you. There are things worse than death.

Good sugestion. Read awhile back that a teen raped and beat an 85 year old woman.

 

[Dirtball]

My mother was that way until we had a conversation with a LEO friend. I stated like I have before in her presence many a time that you don't call the police before there's a man in ur house, or before you have been raped, the police are an after the fact agency for the most part. After our friend agreed and put in his 2 cents she began to pay a little more attention to news accounts of what's going on in this country. She was still on the fence about buying her own but Sandy Hook changed her mind. Now she shoots, just applied for her lifetime, and is about to become an NRA member. She post pro gun facts and stories on FB, all in all I couldn't be happier with her transition. Last time at the range she would not shoot my AK, but she's a work in progress.

 

[churchmouse]

My parents owned several guns. They scared me as they refused to train with them. No issue to buy a new gun but the "Expense" involved with actually using it was a stopping point for them.

 

[Mark 1911]

My wife and I were riding in the car with my mom a few months back. The topic of not shopping at Westfield Mall for Christmas gifts came up. My mom asked me, why won't you shop there? I told her, because of their policies prohibiting the carry of firearms. She said, I don't understand why anyone would want to carry a loaded gun. I said, "I don't understand why anyone would want to carry an unloaded gun. That's when my wife pinched me and said, "Mark, be nice to your mother".