Happy Valentine's Day, we're getting divorced.

[JettaKnight]

If you don't, someone else might.

Since we already started to derail....


[video=youtube;3RueCun_Bh8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RueCun_Bh8[/video]

 

[The Bubba Effect]

If you really get down, remember the immortal words of Al Green: "Oh **** it burns, oooooh ****, somebody help me, oh God, boiling grits are hot, how did you get back in my house you crazy *****!"

 

[hopper68]

Since we already started to derail....


[video=youtube;3RueCun_Bh8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RueCun_Bh8[/video]

Oh yeah

[video=youtube;kWD5gdpt4Dw]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWD5gdpt4Dw[/video]

[video=youtube;yWhpk-8QLFQ]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWhpk-8QLFQ[/video]

 

[churchmouse]

Having went head long down this path not once but "Twice" a good lawyer is the best way to go.

After 2 utter failures (as much me as them) I have settled down with an angel. 35 years now.

There is hope.

 

[Spear Dane]

Really? She really tells you on Valentines day that she wants a divorce? Damn, that's 'black hole in outer space for a heart' cold. Get a lawyer. Get a very excellent lawyer.

 

[bradmedic04]

Ugh. Having met you outside the interwebs and found you to be one of the nicest people ever, I hate to hear you're going through this. I have this process that I've had to use during rough periods in my life, which was learned through many instances of extreme stress and heartache. I sit back, take a deep breath, "check in" with myself about my emotions, and how those emotions are making me feel physically (tense, trembling, eating Burget King, etc.). I embrace feeling those feelings, experience them briefly, but let them pass without holding on. I take a deep breath, slowly release, and let the physical reaction to that tension melt away. Then I take a quick stock of the good things I have (health, other family, full tank of gas, comfortable socks, etc.) and allow myself to enjoy those thoughts. Then----and this is the critical part-----I measure the good in my life against the bad situation, close my eyes and picture myself in a memory I really enjoy. For me, it's a spot I used to climb to as a kid above the Ohio River when it flooded, and created this awesome waterfall that I'm pretty sure no one else knew about. I immerse myself in the sights, sounds, and smells of it, and again allow myself to be happy. That experience becomes mine once again, as if I were enjoying it as a child. I then come back to the present and check back in to see how my body and mind are doing. They're usually much calmer. This whole process takes about 10 seconds. As I'm coming out of this couple seconds of reflection, I also look at the ugly situation and repeat the following to myself: "It doesn't ****ing matter in the grand scheme of things. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I will be OK. I can do this." For me, this is how I do the whole 'Mindfulness' thing, which is all the rage in dudes who for some reason think it's a good idea to get in touch with their feelings. If you're feeling down, see a therapist. It's awesome. Also get an awesome lawyer and stop posting about this publicly.

 

[UTL]

My ex and I were divorced 4 years ago. The day it all went down I said to her that we could split everything up equally like adults or we could get lawyers, spend 10k or our money and end up with the same stupid ****. We were divorced in 61 days from filing, cost us 80 something dollars to file it. Included dealing with two kids also. For the life of me, I can not figure out why people can not be adults with someone the loved at one time.

 

[agerm220]

...all of a sudden I don't want to get married. This is some scary stuff.

 

[Gluemanz28]

I can not figure out why people can not be adults with someone the loved at one time.

Having been through this several times I can tell you that love turns to hate in the blink of an eye.

I also think it's part of a survival mode to be angry at each other to create distance.

Even for all the right reasons divorce SUCKS! It creates an emotional rollercoaster.

 

[Gluemanz28]

Also - if you go around "lawyer shopping" with the intent of creating conflicts of interest so she cannot obtain representation - it will not go well for you if you can prove that you've just been driving around consulting for the purpose of denying her a chance at representation.

Im trying to understand how anybody could possibly prove that.

 

[actaeon277]

This is one of the scariest threads on INGO.

I'm going to go home and tell my wife I love her.




PS - Maybe some Yacht Rock will cheer you up, Eric.

[video=youtube;ecxy0lCQm50]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecxy0lCQm50[/video]

 

[hoosierdoc]

...all of a sudden I don't want to get married. This is some scary stuff.

nah, it's fine. Just don't marry a crazy one. You can tell the crazy ones because they will often spend years acting normal

 

[historian]

[video=youtube;ecxy0lCQm50]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecxy0lCQm50[/video]

I see that and raise it:

[video=youtube;iZRA-Dwv86E]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZRA-Dwv86E[/video]

 

[historian]

...all of a sudden I don't want to get married. This is some scary stuff.

Don't sweat it too much. Just follow the advice of the Crusader at the end of Indiana Jones and don't make him say this:

 

[shootersix]

jeeze....everybody's saying hire a lawyer......I say hire a hitman!

it'll be cheaper!

 

[HoughMade]

Im trying to understand how anybody could possibly prove that.

Not that difficult. If you consult a lawyer and he tells you that he can't represent you because of a conflict of interest having consulted with the other spouse, about the third time that happens, it starts looking bad. Not hard to get a letter from the lawyers. They don't like wasting their time to not get hired.

 

[Gluemanz28]

Not that difficult. If you consult a lawyer and he tells you that he can't represent you because of a conflict of interest having consulted with the other spouse, about the third time that happens, it starts looking bad. Not hard to get a letter from the lawyers. They don't like wasting their time to not get hired.

Have you ever seen it happen that someone got charged with a crime for donig it?

You know there are a lot of shady lawyers in the Valpo area. I might have to do several initial consultations before I find the right fit.

 

[churchmouse]

Don't sweat it too much. Just follow the advice of the Crusader at the end of Indiana Jones and don't make him say this:

View attachment 53227

One of if not the favorite movie line.....

 

[PGRChaplain]

Prayers for a Civil Resolution on this. Can you resolve this without an Attorney, you know the answer already. If you need one do it now.

 

[rhino]

nah, it's fine. Just don't marry a crazy one. You can tell the crazy ones because they will often spend years acting normal

The best indicator of crazy is the XX chromosome pair. it's as close to universally true as it gets.