How do I handle this situation? Lawyers, help please?

[churchmouse]

I see some pretty sound advice here. I'm really just trying to keep from getting my neck broke by this maniac, not trying to be some dang hero. I'll have a talk with her and either go somewhere else or stop seeing her whatsoever. She is going to have to do something though. We are simply just friends, I assure everyone. Thanks again everyone.

Find a new pub/bar.
If he shows again he is,
1...stalking her/you
2...she is telling him.

 

[Redhorse]

Find a new pub/bar.
If he shows again he is,
1...stalking her/you
2...she is telling him.

I'll pay attention. The bar we was at is a popular one in the town I work in but I'll be sure to find out if she said anything to him. This was a one time event, I was simply just trying to find out what defense I had if things escalated beyond my control. I'm not too proud to just walk away but if he's experienced in mixed martial arts I fear I have no chance at defending myself. If only I was more like Chuck Norris

 

[dirtybird]

How will you know when it's time to start shooting the unarmed aggressor?

When youd rather be judged by a jury than buried by your family.

 

[nakinate]

It may not be the macho internet thing to say but, if you insist on still associating with this friend then your best recourse may be to use your legs. Getting the **** out of there if it starts to get stupid keeps you and your friend safe and out of legal trouble. Running is an underrated self defense option.

 

[churchmouse]

I'll pay attention. The bar we was at is a popular one in the town I work in but I'll be sure to find out if she said anything to him. This was a one time event, I was simply just trying to find out what defense I had if things escalated beyond my control. I'm not too proud to just walk away but if he's experienced in mixed martial arts I fear I have no chance at defending myself. If only I was more like Chuck Norris

Having had near the same experiences in my earlier life I see what you are trying to do. I have had a few great female friends. In this there have been boyfriend issues.
Unless someone is standing in your Nike's at the time this happens it is near impossible to say how to handle.

 

[BehindBlueI's]

Find a new pub/bar.
If he shows again he is,
1...stalking her/you
2...she is telling him.

Depends on the size of the town. Sometimes the bar is actually THE bar. One of the joys of small town life is when you break up with someone you get to constantly run into them again. 4-evah.

 

[churchmouse]

Depends on the size of the town. Sometimes the bar is actually THE bar. One of the joys of small town life is when you break up with someone you get to constantly run into them again. 4-evah.

True.......

 

[level0]

Why a bar? Go see a movie, have dinner, go on a walk in a park. There's a trillion things you can do that don't involve bars or drinking. If you smartly want to avoid this guy and the trouble he brings, go places he's not. Have her over to watch a movie, get some carry out, play Sorry or Yahtzee. Take her to the shooting range! Go early Christmas shopping. Bake something together.

If you must go out and drink, go somewhere else. If you live in Indy, go to a bar in Kokomo or Shelbyville or Bloomington or Terre Haute. Go to BRL and get something to go, go to the forest, start a nice safe fire, sit on a log and drink.

 

[halfmileharry]

Why a bar? Go see a movie, have dinner, go on a walk in a park. There's a trillion things you can do that don't involve bars or drinking. If you smartly want to avoid this guy and the trouble he brings, go places he's not. Have her over to watch a movie, get some carry out, play Sorry or Yahtzee. Take her to the shooting range! Go early Christmas shopping. Bake something together.

If you must go out and drink, go somewhere else. If you live in Indy, go to a bar in Kokomo or Shelbyville or Bloomington or Terre Haute. Go to BRL and get something to go, go to the forest, start a nice safe fire, sit on a log and drink.

Sometimes a bar is the shortest distance from point a to point b to get the panties to hit the floor.

 

[Gluemanz28]

It sounds to me that you are on the right track Redhorse. I would let her know that she needs to let this bully know he needs to back off or she will get a RO.

If you suggest going someplace else and she still wants to go where he knows where she will be then she is more interested in the drama than your friendship.

 

[ghuns]

One of the joys of small town life is when you break up with someone you get to constantly run into them again. 4-evah.

My wife and I often run into a girl I dated in high school, 25 years ago. She will go out of her way to be nasty and b!tchy to us.

My wife always remarks afterwards, I don't know what she's still so pissed about, you're we're that great of a catch. She finds it be hilarious.

 

[BehindBlueI's]

I just sat through another jury selection. Another 28 people stating they don't believe it's reasonable to use deadly force vs unarmed. Obviously facts can change that, but that's where people start.

 

[SMiller]

Managing confrontations class will teach you everything you need to know for this situation.

 

[singlesix]

I just sat through another jury selection. Another 28 people stating they don't believe it's reasonable to use deadly force vs unarmed. Obviously facts can change that, but that's where people start.

Hey we have some in this thread that must have been part of that pool.

 

[nakinate]

Hey we have some in this thread that must have been part of that pool.

Who?

 

[ruger1800]

Probably as far as the ex-boyfriend is concerned you are more than strictly "just friends" and a threat to him getting her back.

However psycho you think he is now as an ex-boyfriend remember that she chose to be with him before and I am sure his personality has not changed that much. Some women play weird games so make sure you are not getting used (intentionally or unintentionally) to create drama or for other reasons. Her fantasies of you being her hero and defending her may change when she is on the witness stand stating how you gunned down the man she loved who just wanted to "talk". Look at all the battered women that keep going back for a beating time and time again.

If you are going to continue with this woman and meet her in the same place have witnesses around. Perhaps if you were to leave first and go get the car and pull up to the front door to pick her up. Text her from the car and then have someone inside the bar escort her out the bar door and open your car door for her to get in and then leave. If he stalked her to this bar once it is going to happen again.

Yea this, she may even be playing you to unconsciously commit a crime.

 

[looney2ns]

One of the rules of self defense....don't hang around stupid people doing stupid things in stupid places at stupid times.

 

[scoutsniper]

One of the rules of self defense....don't hang around stupid people doing stupid things in stupid places at stupid times.

or you win stupid prizes...

 

[bwframe]

How will you know when it's time to start shooting the unarmed aggressor?

When youd rather be judged by a jury than buried by your family.

I understand the thought process and generalities, but after which aggressive action do you shoot?

 

[KG1]

Just say...Hey look...I'm not fighting you over this chick..she's not worth it. Then kick him in the nuts and run.