Would you still be his friend?

[Bapak2ja]

I agree on your major point. People throw around the word "friend" without any understanding of the word. A friend will bruise and hurt you; he will tell you the truth, although it hurts him to say the words. A friend tells the truth in love, knowing the truth will eventually have a perfect work in building the life of his friend, on a solid foundation. The relationship the OP describes is nothing more than a convenient association.

I love eloquence in a good cause! Rep inbound!

 

[23mar03]

You posted it up in public, so you want opinions.

Here's mine.

"Two year paid vacation" sounds like a severance package and not unemployment. What one decides to do with their severance package is no ones business but that person. You aren't a friend but a judgmental acquaintance who wants all of their acquaintances to perfectly match their ideals.

If you consider that money from the government(taxpayers) and not the previous employer is "severance package", then you have the same moral issues as the person in question. Just because you can do something, doesn't mean that you should. A few more people like the OP'er could do this country some good, where as we have more and more people looking for a free lunch, like YOU.

Maybe, just maybe the person in question wanted to spend time with his children and had the savings plus the severance package to afford him this precious commodity of time.

There again, NOT a severance package.

The rest of you people making judgement calls on what little is offered sound like the same type of person, if someone doesn't exactly match your ideals, they aren't a good friend. Time to go look in the mirror and see who truly isn't a good friend.

He offered enough information as needed to draw the conclusion that he wanted a free ride for two years and not earn it. If someone doesn't have the same ideals/morals as me, he ceases to become a friend and becomes an aquaintence(downgraded). You can only do so much by telling them that you think that its pretty crappy to take something that you didn't earn when you have the ability. I consider that stealing! If they arn't willing to stop their **** poor behavior, then I will walk away. I'd still be friendly and even give them a helping hand occasionally, but I wouldn't let them hang out with the family every weekend anymore.
And speaking of looking in the mirror, take a good look in there as well for some good old fashioned personal integrity/courage and stop compromising the morals that you once may have had.

Sorry for the blasting there, but I've had a few 'friends' that have done something like this also. When I expressed my concern to them, I was laughed at. Somethings should NOT be compromised.

 

[sadclownwp]

I kinda hope your friend dies in a fire for using my tax dollars to go on vacation. I kinda hope he dies in a fire soon so he will not get to use my tax dollars on another vacation once he retires.

 

[kevman65]

If you consider that money from the government(taxpayers) and not the previous employer is "severance package", then you have the same moral issues as the person in question. Just because you can do something, doesn't mean that you should. A few more people like the OP'er could do this country some good, where as we have more and more people looking for a free lunch, like YOU.

There again, NOT a severance package.

He offered enough information as needed to draw the conclusion that he wanted a free ride for two years and not earn it. If someone doesn't have the same ideals/morals as me, he ceases to become a friend and becomes an aquaintence(downgraded). You can only do so much by telling them that you think that its pretty crappy to take something that you didn't earn when you have the ability. I consider that stealing! If they arn't willing to stop their **** poor behavior, then I will walk away. I'd still be friendly and even give them a helping hand occasionally, but I wouldn't let them hang out with the family every weekend anymore.
And speaking of looking in the mirror, take a good look in there as well for some good old fashioned personal integrity/courage and stop compromising the morals that you once may have had.

Sorry for the blasting there, but I've had a few 'friends' that have done something like this also. When I expressed my concern to them, I was laughed at. Somethings should NOT be compromised.

Show where the OP said he was drawing unemployment please. Laid off means many things and some people still get a severance package when laid off and in some cases it is worth several years of salary and makes one ineligible for unemployment.

Feel free to draw any conclusion YOU like, but by the way the Original Post was worded it was not unemployment or the OP would have stated so.

Now, if he would like to change his Original Post to come right and say his "friend" drew unemployment for 2 years I will change my stance, until that time he is either intentionally being misleading to garner support, or he doesn't know the full circumstances of his "friend" taking a "vacation".

 

[chraland51]

I am not going back to re-read the original post to re-gather the provided information. I just know that when someone has the opportunity to work and turns it down to pursue getting something for free, I do not care for them. I have a couple of leeches/parasites in my family who do not mind at all sitting one their butts and waiting on their monthly check. I think that they have to apply for a job only once a week to keep the checks rolling in. That money is not free. It comes from somewhere, probably originally out of some working stiff's pocket. Times are very rough right now and probably will be for the foreseeable future. I do not begrudge people taking unemployment when they have to. People who refuse to work when handed an opportunity and just want a free ride would not be my friend or even acquaintance. I might have my facts wrong and could be all wet in this situation, but that is just my two cents on the matter.

 

[kevman65]

You guys all have missed something. Laid off in 2008, the Feds hadn't stepped in with their long term extensions yet. Yet the "friend" stated he was taking a 2 year vacation. There was WAY more than unemployment involved.

But go ahead and pass more judgement.

 

[hornadylnl]

I would think someone who cares about their career and resume would not take a 2 year vacation regardless of who's paying for it. I don't think I'd consider any applicant that had zero work history for 2 years.

 

[Que]

You guys all have missed something. Laid off in 2008, the Feds hadn't stepped in with their long term extensions yet. Yet the "friend" stated he was taking a 2 year vacation. There was WAY more than unemployment involved.

But go ahead and pass more judgement.

I have a good FRIEND who was laid off from Lilly and received a very nice package that would last two years for me. He then took another job with one of their suppliers and was recently laid off, receiving a package that would last two years for me. So, laid off for someone making an hourly wage and someone receiving >$300K per year are two different things.

BTW, he has been looking for a job since he received his separation package, so if anyone knows of something...

 

[Jerrek]

I've been unemployed for 9 months. I've applied for over 150 jobs and have had 3 interviews. I HATE being on unemployment. He should have jumped at the chance for a good paying job that doesn't take him away from his family time.

 

[Mrmonte]

In my small world there are only two types of people. Those that have their stuff together and those that dont. I dont have time to waste on people who dont.

 

[88GT]

The rest of you people making judgement calls on what little is offered sound like the same type of person, if someone doesn't exactly match your ideals, they aren't a good friend. Time to go look in the mirror and see who truly isn't a good friend.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up. Depending on where the discrepancy falls, a friend who doesn't share the same priorities and values can be poison. I don't take that chance.

 

[beararms1776]

I had a buddy call me the other day. He was wondering why we haven't talked in years. I wasn't honest but the truth is in 08 he was laid off. I called and offered him work, $59,000 a year job working 35 hours a week. He replied," I am not out to find work right now I am taking a 2 year paid vacation" This is a very fit man with a child, hard worker, and not lazy.

This was one of my closest friends. He works now that his unemployment ran dry. But I now look at him as a POS. Am I in the wrong?

I'll take it! PM me.

 

[Jay]

To tie a friendship together with money, doesn't say much for the "friendship". How proud of a friendship are you when you finally realize you had to pay for it?

Put your life in another person's hands, and hold another person's life in yours. What's it worth to ya? If your answer is $59,000 per year, I feel sorry for you.

 

[23mar03]

. He works now that his unemployment ran dry.

kevman65, Here is something in the OP that you may have missed. Maybe you ought to rethink your comments.......

Also, just because he was 'laid off' doesn't mean that he got a severance package. Most people who are laid off do not get 'severance packages', they get the boot.

 

[PapaScout]

I don't agree with his friend's choice. Like most people on this forum I believe in paying my own way and enjoy the freedom and self-respect that comes from being able to do so. I spent three months on unemployment a few years ago and I hated it.

Would I kick a friend to the curb for making a bad decision? Probably not. Would I loan them money to help them through? Definitely not.

 

[loony1]

Yea, he would still be my friend, but it sounds like you're a ****ty friend.

Is this a man you would trust with your family and/or life? If not, then why was he your friend to begin with? If so, do you require all your friends to be "perfect"? I have drug smoking, liberal hippie friends that work "the system" that are against me being in the military, but we get along and I trust them. Maybe i just have an old school idea of what a friend is.

well put!

 

[Dogman]

By your friend not taking your job offer, did it affect you in any way. Did you know his financial situation. People should have the ability to make their own life choices. A friend is a friend, not a parent, wife, family, judge.

 

[Que]

Can someone tell me how long unemployment lasts? Can someone actually remain on unemployment for two years?

BTW, this could all be cleared up pretty fast if the OP would just clarify if his friend was actually receiving unemployment for two years. If this were the case, I would go back to my question at the top of this post. If the OP cannot say he's sure how his friend provided for his family at the time, whether with savings, severance, part-time job, or unemployment, welfare, food stamps, etc., this is nothing more than a outing/bashing of his associate.

 

[badwolf.usmc]

Can someone tell me how long unemployment lasts? Can someone actually remain on unemployment for two years?

BTW, this could all be cleared up pretty fast if the OP would just clarify if his friend was actually receiving unemployment for two years. If this were the case, I would go back to my question at the top of this post. If the OP cannot say he's sure how his friend provided for his family at the time, whether with savings, severance, part-time job, or unemployment, welfare, food stamps, etc., this is nothing more than a outing/bashing of his associate.

I went on unemployment in 2009 and it was capped at 6 months, though you could get up to 6 months worth of extensions. I was only on it for 2 months, i had a couple months of severance before hand, but it lasted as long as i needed it to for me to find a new job.

 

[45calibre]

i beleive that he is a POS for doing that but i think that you guys were never really friends in the first place if something so petty made you stop talking.

i probably feel the same way about you on him just collecting unemployment and being lazy and living off the system, but was he "REALLY" your friend? i would never stop talking to one of my true friend over something like that.